|
The Self Assessment Tool For Parenting Skills ImprovementNo assessment, no improvemet: The self assessment tool forparenting skills is a way of qualitatively evaluating your parenting skills. Before one can utilize this tool, one must first decide what skills to improve. Thus one must decide what type of good parent you want to be, and, then, consciously pursue this behavior using the self assessment tool to evaluate your progress. One obvious behavior that our kids attend to is the kind of a role model we are. The self assessment tool for parenting skills can be utilized for evaluating how good a role model a parent is. If we model healthy behavior that is what our child will learn, and, alternatively, if we model negative behavior that is what our child will learn. I think every parent, some time, has modeled negative behavior, like swearing for example. How long does it take for a child to learn and begin manifesting that behavior? All too quickly. This illustrates the power of parental modeling or example setting in shaping your child’s behavior. Swearing is an easy behavior to focus the self assessment tool for parenting skills upon since swearing is easy to track. Positive parenting is another important skill that can be evaluated utilizing the self assessment tool for parenting skills. For information on positive parenting, click here. We've chosen to evaluate two important skills with the self assessment tool for parenting: parental modeling (example setting) and positive parenting. Next, make a list of the types of child behavior you would like the self assessment tool for parenting skills to help you evaluate. Your list might include the following:
sometimes slip and swear in front of your child. Next model positive behavior. When you do slip up before your child, you can say something like the following: "Sorry, I shouldn't swear. It sounds bad. I don't like to hear swearing. Besides, everyone makes mistakes. There's no need to be so hard on myself for making a mistake by cursing." Naturally, what you say will depend upon the age of your child. Notice, in the above case, the parent, not only sets a good example by letting the child know that she doesn't like swearing, but she is, also, modeling understanding of why she curses(because she is expecting perfection). What's more, the parent is showing the child, by example, that it is normal to err. Then utilizing positive parenting, look for an excuse to praise your child when she improves. For example, you can praise her when she catches herself cursing because noticing the mistake is the first step to improvement. The above example may lead to a conversation about swearing between parent and child, further deepening the child's understanding of why she shouldn't swear. In the case of the child that wolf's down his food, there exist a variety of ways to approach this problem using positive parenting and role modeling. For a young child, you can simply look at him and model proper eating. Then, using proper parenting, complement him when he complies and each time after that when he eats correctly. You can even comment on how much better the food tastes when eaten slowly. You could mention how the digestive juices increase in the mouth and aid digestion, with slower eating. Both parents can broach the subject and model good eating habits and utilize positive parenting praise when he eats properly. In the case of the child who interrupts adults in mid conversation, you can role play the proper way to interrupt others by showing how to wait patiently and then asking for permission to speak. Then when your child does wait before he interrupts you, you can congratulate him for his improvement. In each of the above cases, utilizing the self assessment tool for parenting skills, make a mental or written note of each time you role modeled the proper behavior and each time you praised your child. When it comes to teaching responsibility, in regards to tidying one's room for example, parenting role modeling and positive parenting are excellent approaches. Start teaching children responsibility when they are young. Help them tidy their rooms, and this will teach them what you expect of them later, when they are older. This is also good role modeling. Showing your child how neat your bedroom is, also, exemplifies good role modeling. When her room is nice and neat, ask her what she thinks. Then give your opinion. You could say something like, "Your room sure looks better when everything is put away." See what she thinks. Then say something like, "You did a good job helping me straighten out your room. One day, you will be able to do it all by yourself. Using this approach, chilren are more likely to cooperate because they enjoy doing things with their parents when they are young. By your example, you're teaching them tidying their rooms is important. You're, also, leaving them with the expectation that one day they will be doing it themselves, thus setting future expectations. That is to say, they will become responsible too. What's more, you praised them. This associates their work with positive rewards and helps make the entire experience positive. Kids are more likely to learn something when it is associated with a positive emotion. Good job! Using the self assessment tool for parenting skills, the parent does five things:
improve parenting?
|
